Your Leadership Superpower - EQ
When it comes to outstanding leadership, emotional intelligence is the key. Emotionally intelligent leaders are self-aware, foster better communication within the workplace, and build more positive, trusting relationships, allowing them to address challenges effectively.
In this post, we'll explore what emotional intelligence is, why it matters for leadership development and some simple ways to improve your EQ skills so you can be more effective as a leader!
Becoming an aware leader
Emotional intelligence doesn't come naturally but is learned and developed over time.
The first step to being an emotionally intelligent leader is understanding the impact of your emotions on others. People with high emotional intelligence can better regulate their actions, control their reactions, and empathise with others. This makes them better able to manage stress and build trust in professional relationships. They also tend to perform better at work because they're more aware of how their actions impact others and how those actions can affect attitudes, behaviours, and performance.
To accomplish this, you need to understand yourself on a deeper level. When you're aware of your triggers, you can stop yourself from reacting and consciously choose how to respond in any given situation.
Do you know your triggers?
What situations cause you to lose control, anger, or become anxious or frustrated?
Your reaction may differ depending on how long it has been since you last felt this way. For example, if it has been a while since you lost control of your emotions, then seeing red might not trigger anger but instead stress or anxiety.
Make a list of what bothers you or sets you off and why they started. When you understand yourself this way, you focus on yourself rather than the other person. The issue you are angry about is rarely the problem.
Lean into the anger
Anger is a normal human emotion; for the most part, it's a good thing. It's how we let ourselves know something is wrong or that we're not getting what we need. Anger can be an essential motivator that helps us fight injustice and stand up for what's right.
When you react with anger to situations where it doesn't make sense, there may be something else going on.
Let it be a checkpoint for an internal review.
Using your EQ Superpower to Breakthrough
To understand others, you need to understand yourself. You, therefore, can't effectively lead people if you don't know them.
Unfortunately, you can't control other people's actions, words or thoughts but can manage your reaction to them. If someone says something negative to you, a trigger may be activated and provoke an emotional response, such as anger or sadness. However, if you understand what this trigger is and how it affects your behaviour, it becomes easier to deal with the situation appropriately. For example: If someone makes a joke at your expense, they are not able to control what they say because it's their natural reaction; however; they do have some responsibility for how others perceive their behaviour, and by choosing humour instead of aggression this shows them controlling themselves rather than simply reacting aggressively.
Your staff want to be heard and cared for, and when you show them that you have integrity and respect for their point of view, even if it's different from yours and respond with emotional intelligence instead of being reactionary, you will have a highly engaged workforce who take pride in what they do and in the business, and it will have a ripple effect in your entire organisation.
Here are some ways to support yourself and build your EQ:
Practice self-regulation - say no when you need to, pause before responding and give yourself time before making a decision.
Stop focusing on the negative aspects - what are the potential positives in this situation?
Talk to a colleague, friend or family member. If possible, talk through what happened with someone who can help you think clearly and not just react in anger or frustration.
Use relaxation techniques such as yoga, meditation or deep breathing exercises until you've calmed down enough that you can respond constructively instead of emotionally. There are plenty of apps and youtube videos that can help you with this.
Take responsibility for your actions and apologise directly.
There is no one tool to help you manage your emotions, and it may take some trial and error and practice before you find it feels natural to you. However, if you want to be an authentic and strong leader developing your emotional intelligence will create the most significant shift within your workforce and also with your customers and clients.
